“Happiness is a butterfly, which when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you” -Nathaniel Hawthorne
I used to retreat to my little home on Navarre Island a few times each year because I knew I could get really quiet and recharge my batteries in the island silence. I know you hear that you have to get quiet and you know, deep inside that this is true. I have a friend who meditates every day for 30 minutes and she is the calmest and most centered person I know. She says meditating is like brushing her teeth. She just can’t leave the house in the morning without doing it. I want to be like her.
My time in Florida was so valuable because I knew that I needed to get quiet or I wouldn’t be able to take care of the life I had created. A life that I wanted to live, not one that I wanted to run from by wrapping myself in the business of the day to day.
One amazing Florida Thanksgiving holiday I took my beach blanket to the big cozy rocking chairs on my little deck so that I could watch the impending sunset. I missed the sunset. The butterflies took over. My Florida Momma Edna picked out my little island home for me and I purchased it sight unseen based on her recommendation. She chose it because right there off of the little deck was a baby palm tree. Probably just 4 feet tall the first time I saw it, this beautiful and strong little palm tree had a destiny. I used to talk to it when I sat outside contemplating the what is and what if’s and it grew like a maniac as a result. It lived through Hurricane Ivan and is still standing very strong and very tall today having acquired just a little lean for weathering the years.
Thanksgiving was a tough one that year and I planned on talking to my palm tree and the sunsets about life at length. But the butterflies were there instead. HUGE monarch butterflies on their Fall migration south were all over my deck, my chair, their palm tree and me. As big as the palm of my hand they would flutter and then land, hundreds and hundreds of them. Then in slow motion they would pulsate and rest. Rest quietly and deeply before they would flutter away with renewed strength.
I sat speechless and amazed for hours with the magnificent butterflies. As each one of them rejuvenated and repaired themselves before taking off on the next leg of their journey, I felt myself rejuvenating and repairing. I found I was breathing in the same pattern as their wings beat, slowly, methodically and deeply.
I left my island a new woman after that particular silent Thanksgiving trip with new Thanksgiving gratitude deep in my soul.
The universe tells you constantly that you must get quiet before you move on with existing. Sometimes it tells you subtly like in the drifting in and out of a butterfly that commands your attention. Sometimes it will tell you seriously with an accident or passing of a loved one. By now you must know that the universe will command your attention when you least want to give it. You also know that you must listen.
If you don’t get quiet you will not live the way you are meant to live. Your business will not survive and be a success the way you want it to survive and be successful if you don’t take time to get quiet. If you don’t find your butterflies, you will not live preciously the way you were intended to. I challenge you to find your butterflies and fulfill your spiritual destiny.
This post and more: www.recipesfromalife.tateauthor.com
Friday, April 22, 2011
Sunday, April 17, 2011
www.recipesfromalife.tateauthor.com
What a magnificent learning curve. From the binder under the bed to the contract with Tate Publishing to now, a national release date only weeks away. I’ve been asked many times what I plan to do with The Book and my answer has been very simple: If I can help one small business owner get a hold of what they are doing so that they can manage themselves to success and avoid devastating failure, I will be happy. I think I’ve been lying.
Honestly, I want to help a lot of people in many of places in amazing ways. I am energized when I bring someone to a light bulb moment and I want to be full of energy for success all the time, everywhere.
One person? Who am I kidding? Everyone deserves success and peace of mind! Everyone. Including you.
The web page is ready. Slowly I’ll be moving the posts from this blog. Doing a little rewriting and tweaking as I see the style is changing. My goal is fewer words and greater impact.
Feel free to comment and review. Interaction is a priority. This is all about you!
Many blessings for you and your success!
Bookmark it: www.recipesfromalife.tateauthor.com
Honestly, I want to help a lot of people in many of places in amazing ways. I am energized when I bring someone to a light bulb moment and I want to be full of energy for success all the time, everywhere.
One person? Who am I kidding? Everyone deserves success and peace of mind! Everyone. Including you.
The web page is ready. Slowly I’ll be moving the posts from this blog. Doing a little rewriting and tweaking as I see the style is changing. My goal is fewer words and greater impact.
Feel free to comment and review. Interaction is a priority. This is all about you!
Many blessings for you and your success!
Bookmark it: www.recipesfromalife.tateauthor.com
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Recklessness Strewn All About The Highway
In the left hand lane of four lanes of traffic I am on cruse, with the lid down on my little green convertible pegged at about 5 miles over the speed limit. I am minding my own business, singing at the top of my lungs when a motorcycle flies up to my right hand side. After a brief pause, the driver, sans helmet, turns on the gas and with a serious spike flies past and then in front of me and then is a dot miles down the pavement in an instant. I can’t get the video out of my mind of the girl on the back, in short shorts, sandals and a backpack, jolting backwards and then forwards with the change of velocity. Hanging on for dear life.
Reckless. And very young.
Then just a few hours later, still with the lid down and on my return trip. Quiet and not singing this time, I hear the hard fast buzz of motorcycles coming up behind me. Six of them. Weaving in and out of traffic at breakneck speed, passing in the shoulder on the left and the right leaving all of us late night drivers stunned. They left me out of breath with their speed.
When we are first starting out, we are reckless. Invincible. Like the teenage driver who thinks, ‘It can never happen to me.’ I’ll never get into an accident. I’ll never get caught. They will never know it was me. The recklessness of youth.
The recklessness of being a young business owner. I can do this better than anyone else has done it before. My way is going to be the right way. The previous owner didn’t know what they were doing. I know what is best. I don’t need to listen to you.
I remember when I sold my company, the new owner kept questioning some of the business decisions I had made. Why was I charging this particular amount and why was I doing this, this way. I was making conscience decisions based on lessons I had learned the hard way. I was making decisions for particular reasons. I was doing for my customers and my company what needed to be done after 18 years of learning. After so long, I was not reckless. My business was tenured and lessons had been learned the hard way.
The men who bought my business didn’t see things my way and thought they could run things better, their way. You already know the end of that story and sadly, it isn’t pretty.
On both sides of my travel last night, I expected to get a spell down the road and see flashing lights and to hear sirens. I expected to see motorcycles down on the ground and bodies that just weren’t going to make it. The recklessness of the young strewn all about the highway.
Don’t be reckless with your young business. Manage it. Baby it. Treat it and yourself with respect. Listen to your gut, study your competition, establish powerful business relationships. Read the book. (Yes, please, clink on the link above.)
In other words, wear your helmet and go the speed limit. I don’t want to see you surrounded by flashing lights on the side of the road.
Reckless. And very young.
Then just a few hours later, still with the lid down and on my return trip. Quiet and not singing this time, I hear the hard fast buzz of motorcycles coming up behind me. Six of them. Weaving in and out of traffic at breakneck speed, passing in the shoulder on the left and the right leaving all of us late night drivers stunned. They left me out of breath with their speed.
When we are first starting out, we are reckless. Invincible. Like the teenage driver who thinks, ‘It can never happen to me.’ I’ll never get into an accident. I’ll never get caught. They will never know it was me. The recklessness of youth.
The recklessness of being a young business owner. I can do this better than anyone else has done it before. My way is going to be the right way. The previous owner didn’t know what they were doing. I know what is best. I don’t need to listen to you.
I remember when I sold my company, the new owner kept questioning some of the business decisions I had made. Why was I charging this particular amount and why was I doing this, this way. I was making conscience decisions based on lessons I had learned the hard way. I was making decisions for particular reasons. I was doing for my customers and my company what needed to be done after 18 years of learning. After so long, I was not reckless. My business was tenured and lessons had been learned the hard way.
The men who bought my business didn’t see things my way and thought they could run things better, their way. You already know the end of that story and sadly, it isn’t pretty.
On both sides of my travel last night, I expected to get a spell down the road and see flashing lights and to hear sirens. I expected to see motorcycles down on the ground and bodies that just weren’t going to make it. The recklessness of the young strewn all about the highway.
Don’t be reckless with your young business. Manage it. Baby it. Treat it and yourself with respect. Listen to your gut, study your competition, establish powerful business relationships. Read the book. (Yes, please, clink on the link above.)
In other words, wear your helmet and go the speed limit. I don’t want to see you surrounded by flashing lights on the side of the road.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
I Want You to Feel Really, Really Good
I feel good. I mean I feel really good. Better than I’ve felt in a long time. I’ve made some big decisions lately and have made some gigantic and scary changes as a result. Today, I feel good. I am over the hump. I’m settling in.
Too often when we are in business for ourselves we have to make reactive instead of proactive decisions. We react on the spot to things that affect our day to day business. A key employee out sick or with an emergency causes you to make reactionary changes to your plans. An important customer has last minute demands that cause you to again make reactionary changes to possibly not only your personal or professional plans but to your employee plans and more seriously to your bank account plans. You write reactionary checks, have reactionary conversations that you might not have been ready for and you make reactionary decisions that in hindsight were not the best for your business’ long term health.
I am big on the 24 hour rule especially when I shop. There have been many times My Lia and I were shopping and saw something that we just had to have. Instant retail therapy gratification. Nine and a half times out of ten when we apply the 24 hour, the ‘if we still want it we can come back and get it tomorrow rule’, we don’t go back and get whatever the item was. We even have forgotten what we found so awesome about the item the very next day. We have saved countless dollars with the 24 hour rule. (Just look in your closet and I dare you to tell me there isn’t anything hanging in there that you should have applied the 24 hour rule to.)
What if we all applied the 24 hour rule to our business practices? Instead of blowing up at the employee, we waited 24 hours so we could address the issue without emotion. Instead of jumping on an opportunity to make a business change that at first glance looks appetizing, what if you waited just 24 hours and really thought through the pros and cons. What if you gave yourself the gift of a day to look before you jumped at a chance that seems, of course, too good to be true? Any great opportunity that is meant to be will be happy to hear you say, “May I please have 24 hours think this through and I’ll get back to you by ‘x’ time tomorrow?”
I gave myself 24 hours times a month or two and three before I made my recent large decisions and I am proud of myself for giving my decisions the time to percolate. I challenge you to give your decisions the time to assimilate and fester if need be before you respond and react. Allow yourself, as the entrepreneur, the responsible opportunity to make proactive instead of reactive decisions. You will be amazed at the positive change you will make to the process of running your business.
I want you to feel good. Really, really good.
Too often when we are in business for ourselves we have to make reactive instead of proactive decisions. We react on the spot to things that affect our day to day business. A key employee out sick or with an emergency causes you to make reactionary changes to your plans. An important customer has last minute demands that cause you to again make reactionary changes to possibly not only your personal or professional plans but to your employee plans and more seriously to your bank account plans. You write reactionary checks, have reactionary conversations that you might not have been ready for and you make reactionary decisions that in hindsight were not the best for your business’ long term health.
I am big on the 24 hour rule especially when I shop. There have been many times My Lia and I were shopping and saw something that we just had to have. Instant retail therapy gratification. Nine and a half times out of ten when we apply the 24 hour, the ‘if we still want it we can come back and get it tomorrow rule’, we don’t go back and get whatever the item was. We even have forgotten what we found so awesome about the item the very next day. We have saved countless dollars with the 24 hour rule. (Just look in your closet and I dare you to tell me there isn’t anything hanging in there that you should have applied the 24 hour rule to.)
What if we all applied the 24 hour rule to our business practices? Instead of blowing up at the employee, we waited 24 hours so we could address the issue without emotion. Instead of jumping on an opportunity to make a business change that at first glance looks appetizing, what if you waited just 24 hours and really thought through the pros and cons. What if you gave yourself the gift of a day to look before you jumped at a chance that seems, of course, too good to be true? Any great opportunity that is meant to be will be happy to hear you say, “May I please have 24 hours think this through and I’ll get back to you by ‘x’ time tomorrow?”
I gave myself 24 hours times a month or two and three before I made my recent large decisions and I am proud of myself for giving my decisions the time to percolate. I challenge you to give your decisions the time to assimilate and fester if need be before you respond and react. Allow yourself, as the entrepreneur, the responsible opportunity to make proactive instead of reactive decisions. You will be amazed at the positive change you will make to the process of running your business.
I want you to feel good. Really, really good.
Saturday, April 2, 2011
A Subtle Aphrodisiac
There is a teeny little Italian restaurant in Austin called Andiamo. It is in a funky decaying strip center between an Asian Buffet and a Thai massage parlor. (Neither of which you would ever dream of entering.) I remember my first dinner at Andiamo. A ‘what the heck are we doing here?’ last minute event that ended up being sublime.
My experience had everything to do with the Sambuca with the three perfectly placed espresso beans floating it. Atmosphere, dreamy, very European. Fresh fragrant Posey in little glass vase on each crisp white table cloth. Dramatic plate presentation. Delicious wine suggestions. Service smooth like a subtle aphrodisiac. Transportation to another place.
After a dinner that just couldn’t get any better, they swept the crumbs and anything else we didn’t need from our crisp white table cloth and served us with a slight flourish, complementary, a beautiful cordial each of Amaretto and Sambuca with the three perfectly placed espresso beans floating in it.
Over the top. What a signature! What a great sussie! Brilliant move! What an excellent way to cap off an excellent dining experience. I became Andiamo’s biggest fan and made it a point to dine there at least a half a dozen times over the next year and tell everyone I knew that they needed to dine there also.
Then life happened and I lost a year before an opportunity presented itself to enjoy Andiamo again. I dressed carefully in anticipation of another spectacular evening. It had been much too long and I was thrilled just thinking about what would be a chart topping event and a much needed special dinner. Dinner was again delicious and dreamy. But, to my tremendous disappointment, no Amaretto and no Sambuca. None. Cutting corners, Andiamo dropped straight into normal.
Seriously disappointed, I haven’t returned and won’t. Eliminating the little inexpensive sussie that put dining at Andiamo over the top, dropped them into whatever.
What little thing do you do that puts doing business with you into the spectacular category? What little piece of unexpected fluff do you offer that your customers can’t get anywhere else? There is a shoe company called SAS that puts in your shopping bag a tiny SAS box containing a piece of Almond Roca candy. That little piece of mouth watering Almond Roca makes their customers excited about the prospect of buying shoes from them. Think about it. Signature candy in a shoe store. Excellent divergence.
Define a little unexpected thing that can be your own. In Recipes From A Life, I call this your Sussies and Fluff. Find your sussie. Find your fluff. Make it your own. And then never stop using it. Put yourself over the top of your competition by offering that little special thing that is going to make your service both unique and special.
Meantime, I am still looking for that fabulous dining experience at that special place what will recreate the feeling Andiamo once gave me. Ideas?
My experience had everything to do with the Sambuca with the three perfectly placed espresso beans floating it. Atmosphere, dreamy, very European. Fresh fragrant Posey in little glass vase on each crisp white table cloth. Dramatic plate presentation. Delicious wine suggestions. Service smooth like a subtle aphrodisiac. Transportation to another place.
After a dinner that just couldn’t get any better, they swept the crumbs and anything else we didn’t need from our crisp white table cloth and served us with a slight flourish, complementary, a beautiful cordial each of Amaretto and Sambuca with the three perfectly placed espresso beans floating in it.
Over the top. What a signature! What a great sussie! Brilliant move! What an excellent way to cap off an excellent dining experience. I became Andiamo’s biggest fan and made it a point to dine there at least a half a dozen times over the next year and tell everyone I knew that they needed to dine there also.
Then life happened and I lost a year before an opportunity presented itself to enjoy Andiamo again. I dressed carefully in anticipation of another spectacular evening. It had been much too long and I was thrilled just thinking about what would be a chart topping event and a much needed special dinner. Dinner was again delicious and dreamy. But, to my tremendous disappointment, no Amaretto and no Sambuca. None. Cutting corners, Andiamo dropped straight into normal.
Seriously disappointed, I haven’t returned and won’t. Eliminating the little inexpensive sussie that put dining at Andiamo over the top, dropped them into whatever.
What little thing do you do that puts doing business with you into the spectacular category? What little piece of unexpected fluff do you offer that your customers can’t get anywhere else? There is a shoe company called SAS that puts in your shopping bag a tiny SAS box containing a piece of Almond Roca candy. That little piece of mouth watering Almond Roca makes their customers excited about the prospect of buying shoes from them. Think about it. Signature candy in a shoe store. Excellent divergence.
Define a little unexpected thing that can be your own. In Recipes From A Life, I call this your Sussies and Fluff. Find your sussie. Find your fluff. Make it your own. And then never stop using it. Put yourself over the top of your competition by offering that little special thing that is going to make your service both unique and special.
Meantime, I am still looking for that fabulous dining experience at that special place what will recreate the feeling Andiamo once gave me. Ideas?
Monday, March 28, 2011
In the Elevator and Off the Deep End
Got into an elevator today. On the first floor. This particular elevator only travels between two floors. One and two. I was going to two. Got in, pushed the button and then just checked myself out. My mind went on a spin of its own volition. Jolting back to present I realized that I had pushed floor one, hadn’t moved to two and had actually been ‘gone’ for almost five minutes.
Yes, you would think, this chick has gone off the deep end and you would be right. I am on overload. Do you ever check back in to realize that you are sitting in the middle of a red light intersection? Do you ever have a conversation with someone only to realize later that you have no recollection of what was said? Or of what you promised in follow up? Do you ever read and reread and still not grasp what you may have read? Do you ever multi-task so heavily that your brain just does an elevator black out?
I am thinking about times I haven’t been present. Present in the moment, in my life. Lost moments just trying to exist instead of really living. Lost moments that have turned into days, weeks and probably months. I have a dear friend who has six children. One day many, many years ago we were talking on the phone about what was up and she told me a colorful story about playing Barbie’s on the floor with her daughter. With six children, her house was a wreck and she had laundry piled up for days and yet she was spending time one on one playing! I was the one who couldn’t go to bed with dirty dishes in the sink and here she was leaving dirty dishes for days just so she could spend time with her daughter-playing.
She was present in her life. I want us all to be both successful AND present in our lives!
How many promises have we made to our customers that we don’t realize we failed to come through on because we don’t even remember having the conversation? How many opportunities have we lost to develope a relationship with a vendor for thinking they were just there to sell something instead of thinking they might be there to partner with you? To help YOU grow YOUR business?! How many conversations have we had with an employe and instead of focusing on them, we were thinking about something or someone else?
How much time have we spent in a multitasking existance, instead of living in the moment? How much time have we wasted not managing ourselves and not having a plan of action in place?
Next phone conversation, I challenge you to not email or doodle draw at the same time. Next time an employee or customer comes in to visit, you are challenged to turn off your computer screen and put down your pen and invite them to sit for a spell. Next time you sit at your desk to get some work done, you are going to have a plan in place and accomplish what you need to one task at a time. You ARE going to be present in your work within your business.
Next time I get into an elevator, I am going to skip the mini-stroke.
Yes, you would think, this chick has gone off the deep end and you would be right. I am on overload. Do you ever check back in to realize that you are sitting in the middle of a red light intersection? Do you ever have a conversation with someone only to realize later that you have no recollection of what was said? Or of what you promised in follow up? Do you ever read and reread and still not grasp what you may have read? Do you ever multi-task so heavily that your brain just does an elevator black out?
I am thinking about times I haven’t been present. Present in the moment, in my life. Lost moments just trying to exist instead of really living. Lost moments that have turned into days, weeks and probably months. I have a dear friend who has six children. One day many, many years ago we were talking on the phone about what was up and she told me a colorful story about playing Barbie’s on the floor with her daughter. With six children, her house was a wreck and she had laundry piled up for days and yet she was spending time one on one playing! I was the one who couldn’t go to bed with dirty dishes in the sink and here she was leaving dirty dishes for days just so she could spend time with her daughter-playing.
She was present in her life. I want us all to be both successful AND present in our lives!
How many promises have we made to our customers that we don’t realize we failed to come through on because we don’t even remember having the conversation? How many opportunities have we lost to develope a relationship with a vendor for thinking they were just there to sell something instead of thinking they might be there to partner with you? To help YOU grow YOUR business?! How many conversations have we had with an employe and instead of focusing on them, we were thinking about something or someone else?
How much time have we spent in a multitasking existance, instead of living in the moment? How much time have we wasted not managing ourselves and not having a plan of action in place?
Next phone conversation, I challenge you to not email or doodle draw at the same time. Next time an employee or customer comes in to visit, you are challenged to turn off your computer screen and put down your pen and invite them to sit for a spell. Next time you sit at your desk to get some work done, you are going to have a plan in place and accomplish what you need to one task at a time. You ARE going to be present in your work within your business.
Next time I get into an elevator, I am going to skip the mini-stroke.
Monday, March 14, 2011
Obnoxiously Oblivious and in a Bikini
There is no excuse for being obnoxiously oblivious. I know I am not the only one out here that has a problem with the rudeness of oblivious people. I am easily irritated by people who walk through life with no clue as to how their actions or words may impact the universe around them.
I am lounging on my beach. One whole mile plus of sugar white sand and crystal clear water are mine and mine alone. There are no waves and the seagulls are loving the calm as much as I am. Not a person in sight. No noise but the sea, the sandpipers and the occasional pelican. I was desperate for this beach respite and am so thankful to be here. It is 65 degrees outside and I am comfortable sitting in the sand like it is my second skin even though I have clothes on.
Deep into meditation I hear voices. Two squealing obnoxious female voices. Regretfully, I open my eyes to see two size 4 bleach blonde thirty something’s in bikinis and expensive sunglasses. Wide open beach, again, not a soul in sight and these two supremely idiotic women are screaming like lunatics braving the cold water in their little Victoria Secret band aids with ruffles on their butts RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. Are you freaking serious? So oblivious to ME that on this EMPTY and wide expanse of beach they literally stop not 10 yards from ME and my meditative and fully clothed state?
As I watch these two bimbos shriek as they dunk their long highlighted tresses in the salt water, I have to wonder about the times I have probably done the same exact thing. (Not the shrieking in the salt water in a band aid thing, the being rude thing.) Wanting to dance in the waves, was I oblivious to what was going on with someone else’s personal space? Was I in a place of intention with my business and my goals that I didn’t open myself up to the needs of someone meditating right beside me? Have you so lost yourself in your business and what you wanted that you forgot what your customer needed? Forgot a promise you made to an employee? Have there been times when you have been oblivious to the golden rule in business that the customer is indeed, your Boss? That you just might need your employees to help take care of The Boss?
With my peaceful state interrupted, I left the beach, walking through the sand, over the dune to the beach house. Under the stairs, I stripped to my panties and bra (no, not from Victoria Secret) and used the outside shower hose to wash the sand off of my feet, up my legs and off of my arms. Shaking out my clothes and preparing to manage the stairs up to the balcony, I noticed the gaggle of construction workers having lunch on the balcony of the house next to ours.
Yes, that would be me. Fifty something in my panties and bra being obnoxiously oblivious. Damn it.
I am lounging on my beach. One whole mile plus of sugar white sand and crystal clear water are mine and mine alone. There are no waves and the seagulls are loving the calm as much as I am. Not a person in sight. No noise but the sea, the sandpipers and the occasional pelican. I was desperate for this beach respite and am so thankful to be here. It is 65 degrees outside and I am comfortable sitting in the sand like it is my second skin even though I have clothes on.
Deep into meditation I hear voices. Two squealing obnoxious female voices. Regretfully, I open my eyes to see two size 4 bleach blonde thirty something’s in bikinis and expensive sunglasses. Wide open beach, again, not a soul in sight and these two supremely idiotic women are screaming like lunatics braving the cold water in their little Victoria Secret band aids with ruffles on their butts RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. Are you freaking serious? So oblivious to ME that on this EMPTY and wide expanse of beach they literally stop not 10 yards from ME and my meditative and fully clothed state?
As I watch these two bimbos shriek as they dunk their long highlighted tresses in the salt water, I have to wonder about the times I have probably done the same exact thing. (Not the shrieking in the salt water in a band aid thing, the being rude thing.) Wanting to dance in the waves, was I oblivious to what was going on with someone else’s personal space? Was I in a place of intention with my business and my goals that I didn’t open myself up to the needs of someone meditating right beside me? Have you so lost yourself in your business and what you wanted that you forgot what your customer needed? Forgot a promise you made to an employee? Have there been times when you have been oblivious to the golden rule in business that the customer is indeed, your Boss? That you just might need your employees to help take care of The Boss?
With my peaceful state interrupted, I left the beach, walking through the sand, over the dune to the beach house. Under the stairs, I stripped to my panties and bra (no, not from Victoria Secret) and used the outside shower hose to wash the sand off of my feet, up my legs and off of my arms. Shaking out my clothes and preparing to manage the stairs up to the balcony, I noticed the gaggle of construction workers having lunch on the balcony of the house next to ours.
Yes, that would be me. Fifty something in my panties and bra being obnoxiously oblivious. Damn it.
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